If you really want to know the opinion of a bonafide expert (on the internet?!? oh boy, who wouldn't), the most fucked up and horrifying stretch of any horror movie is from 30:21 to 40:24 in The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974). There is no more upsetting slide into absolute panic in cinema history like those ten minutes, just a total day ruiner.

So naturally I'm gonna watch it 50 times to prepare for a podcast appearance. I was excited for this, because I'm a fool.

"You will be transforming a situation in your life now with a positive attitude" is so off the mark, even by fortune cookie standards, that it has to be a troll.

Tuesday night baybe, let's drink til we get jaundice.

First they killed John Wick's dog, then he killed his dogma.

I'm sure this is extremely old hat but playing Dark Souls and the original Castelvania back to back reveal they are, in fact, the same game. The basic loop of both is hilariously difficult sections of level that you slowly unknot and internalize via countless deaths until it just becomes about muscle memory and execution as you try to reach and learn the boss patterns, the defeat of each is a mini-miracle that's exciting enough to make you do it again.

Also every person in a Mountain Goats crowd looks like an ex of mine.

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A sold out concert. The middle of the headliner's set. In the lull in between songs, I shout out the name of an obscure b-side from their earlier work at the top of my lungs. The rest of the audience bursts into applause. I have proven myself to be the best and coolest fan. Two roadies make their way into the crowd and pick me up on their shoulders, carrying me to the stage. The band lets me choose the rest of the songs they play. The venue gives me free tickets for life. The cover of the band's next album is a portrait of me. The bassist asks me to be a godparent to their child.

Was very tired after the Mountain Goats show last night and read a dude's ACAB shirt as "Assigned Cat At Birth".

Until the fourth level, fuck you Frankenstein.

Wow the first Castlevania game is really good.

Never thought I would be a scanlines bitch but it turns out I am that scanlines bitch.

Every flavor of La Croix is actually "aluminum".

It's a week away and I still have no idea how to watch Double Or Nothing on the internet, AEW why do you do me like this.

That Castlevania collection comes out tomorrow and I am totally psyched.

Sex is like pizza: you are still you afterwards, and being you is terrible.

Wrestling is still great and every time I go to AAW something insane like this happens.


"Damn, I should just be a mayonnaise farmer." - @tessaracked, saying super gross sentences while playing video games

Patrick boosted
Patrick boosted

I'm gonna take my horse to the hotel room
I'm gonna ride til I can't no more

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Generalistic and moderated instance.