Computer science student. Dirty rotten red. Training to be a Gorgon. Bit weird.
The federated timeline should just be renamed the hentai timeline
I am young dumb and full of existential dread
Oh dang one follower off the sex number. This is what my therapist meant by setting life goals
In the year 2030 "likes" and "faves" will become the only form of currency. I am building my wealth empire early
Downloading movies from the pirate bay, not to watch them, just for the thrill
Much like the notorious B.I.G I am ready to die
People who try to tell me pickles are cucumbers. Take your conspiracy theories elsewhere
Setting up social media for all my pets, but it is a ruse, my pets have no interest in boosts or faves. It was me all along
Having to explain to grown ass adults why using "Jew" as an insult is terrible. Give me strength please
Boss: you're fired Me: you can't fire me, what about BOFA?Boss: these "jokes" are the exact reason you're being fired-Me: BOTH OF THESE NUTZ hahahaha
Chugging 5 cups of chamomile tea to try and calm down after reading a bad toot
gender is a scam invented by bathroom companies in the 1960's in order to sell more bathrooms
My feed two weeks ago: "boy I love boosting", "let's all make new friends"My feed now: "look at this shithead: *screenshot*", "mods are fascists", *some obscure e-celebs arguing*I tried to warn you, we are our own worst enemy.
I was three hours late to work due to mistakenly boarding the bang bus
The takeaway delivery guy has started saying "see you soon", if I order any more pizza he'll introduce me to his parents
Glad to wake up to some twitter-esque melo-drama apparently
Being told the UK has no demand for cowboys yet it has a shit tonne of cows. What the heck guys
Much like Peter Parker is great at taking photos of Spiderman because he is Spiderman, I am great at taking photos of wildlife because I'm a furry.
Gonna rent a lonely cabin in the woods in the hopes of getting hacked to death by a maniac with an axe. Just need to find a stoner and jock to one with me
Everyone is welcome as long as you follow our code of conduct! Thank you.
Mastodon.cloud is maintained by Sujitech, LLC.