One day Pinocchio came to Gepetto with a problem.
"Every time I have sex with my girlfriend, she gets splinters. What can I do about this?"
"Have you tried sandpaper?" Pinocchio hadn't, so he went to try it.
"Pinocchio," said Gepetto a few weeks later. "How is the problem work out with your--"
"Girlfriend?" said Pinocchio. "Who needs a girlfriend when you have sandpaper?"

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