chris @blueback@mastodon.cloud

Me during sex: hurt me

You all: no, that's twitter mentality

Me: what?

You: you don't need a meme format to talk about your insecurities here

me: my computers slow. are computrers slow

everyone: yes computers slow

me: thanks

V ocally
E ating
R oasted
I nsects and
F ucking
I ntensely
E ven while
D ead inside

boost to throw her squishy dino

it’s been 8 weeks since my vasectomy and i need to give them a sample to make sure it worked. this is the first time in my life i’ve had to remind myself to do this

Leftists are like crows:

a) inteligint
b) they will fight you for food
c) surprisingly numerous
d) dark plumage
e) possibly their own worst enemies? [see f]
f) culture impossible to decipher for outsiders and possibly insiders
g) can be a nuisance in dense urban areas

Boost for Eugen ignore for Jack

[bangs on the glass outside a business meeting]
boss: what is it
me: toot
boss: what
me: toot
boss: is he saying toot? what is that
me: toot

mastodon is twitter but played in a major key

love to log on. to have fun. online. with my pals. online. hell yeah. online.

When you’re tooting and your text leaves you with 420 characters left 😎🌬💨🌳🌳

i had a dream that fortnite streamer ninja played me American Boy by Estelle, and used that to illustrate why he chooses not to stream with women. He was like "listen to the sexual tension between kanye and estelle.. thats what happens when artists collaborate. I must be faithful to my wife."