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Food, fish 

Hummus and smoked salmon on rosemary toast for breakfast

Take that, two dollar avocados! I can still get my daily requirement of bougie breakfast without you!

One time I was cleaning out the fridge and there were all these essentially empty mustards. Like too many mustards. Like 7 or 8 mustards. And instead of throwing them out I combined the remnants into 1 super mustard. It was like a Voltron mustard. It was the best condiment we had. The perfect mustard. I’ve tried to recreate the formula but never gotten it just right. I’m like the guy who made captain America basically.

Just shuffle these in with the propane heater, it can heat a house 4 times the size of God, boopin galaxies

Tobacco 

The local tobacconist has a pipe tobacco called β€œBurly without Bite” and that sounds like a preference checkbox on Fetlife

have you guys heard of this game called minecraft? it's kinda like lego but a video game

If you get a big enough ball of hydrogen together eventually it'll turn into people

diarrhoea is short for Saint Diarrhoea’s Disease, the disease that Saint Diarrhoea famously died of, which is why they call it that

I’ve had all the major tick-borne illnesses and most of the minor ones. I was the only ehrlichiosis case they’d ever had.

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