Hello, Mastodonors. I've been away. What did I miss?

An edit button, an edit button, my kingdom for an edit button.

I just realized I had four separate camera apps running on my phone...

Hmm. It occurs to me that I haven't been 429 Throttled in a while. I wonder if the instance set up got tweaked a bit to handle traffic better.

Even the plague of followbots has an antecedent in the early days of Twitter.

Maybe a "Post only to local timeline" option would be useful. Use case: My home timeline is getting a fair number of admin meta posts about an instance I don't have an account on.

"It was there, in a dank dungeon laboratory, where he operated his fiendish devices with ne'er the cleansing gaze of sunlight to dispell the unutterable horror of his machinations that he produced the first of his many perversions of the natural order, to wit: ravioly inside a metal can."

β€”Edgar Allen Poe, "The Alaruming Case of Chef Boyardee"

Dang it. Why doesn't my "content warning" label actually work when I toot my toot?

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Okay, I'm going to try the "content warning" button again and see if it works this time. Warning, this content is extremely dangerous.

My iPhone won't update. My Fitbit won't charge. Then Mastodon told me I couldn't log in and accused me of blocking its cookies.

I wonder if it is possible at all to do an "ephemeral Mastodon"...

...as in, all toots from a particular account (as per account setting) will disappear within 24 hours, no exception...

Among the domains I own for no particular reason are breakfastcrunch.com and douchefactory.com. Maybe they've just been waiting for Mastodon to give them a reason for being.

If she hadn't been yelling at her kid that way, I would have told her she had a "Hello, My Name Is" sticker on her butt, but she was, so I didn't, and she walked away.

I'm almost tempted to start tooting lots of company names, just so I can experience them not inanely replying to me.

the way to handle with celebrity impersonators on masto: don't follow any celebrities ever

How many masters would a mastodon don, if a mastodon would don masters?

Here's a poem for the people who read too much into my toot a while back about the perceived impermanence of instances...

Second Fig
By Edna St. Vincent Millay

Safe upon the solid rock the ugly houses stand:
Come and see my shining palace built upon the sand!

RIP, Don Rickles.

First actual bit of real news I've gotten from Mastodon.

As I see more toots en français on the federated timeline, I can't help but wonder if they are "toots" or "pets." Has the UI been localized at all?

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